What Did You Expect??

There is an awesome book called "What Did You Expect??" that was given to us last year for Christmas. Brandon's brother gave us the book because a group of guys he knew that were married had studied this with their wives. I don't think he even knew how great the book was when he gave it to us, and we honestly didn't know how great it was until just the other week. One night when I was sitting out in our living room before bed, I spotted the book on the shelf. Curious about what was inside, I began reading. The next thing you know, I had been reading for close to two hours. Needless to say, the chapter that I flipped to first was right on. Funny enough, I didn't start at chapter one. I flipped right to chapter thirteen titled "Amazing Grace". There was a quote at the beginning of the chapter that sums up exactly what Brandon and I have been learning: 


"The more we love any that are not as we are, the less we love as men and the more as God." -John Saltmarsh


I feel like that just sums it all up! We are realizing all the more that God has purposely intersected our two {different} stories for a reason. There is a reason he is the way he is. There is a reason I am the way I am. God made him that way for a purpose. God made me the way I am for a purpose. As it says in the book, "We will deal with our differences with appreciation and grace." That sounds so nice but is oftentimes a hard pill to swallow. I am the type who wants to talk and debrief about the day - if Brandon knows me well, won't he initiate this face-to-face time to hear? Brandon is the type that needs "cave" time and to not be talked to - if I know him well, won't I take note that he's had a long day and doesn't really want to talk about it right now? Whoooo! Just a little window into our worlds. At the end of the day, we look at each other with smiles on our faces as we marvel at the fact that God is the one writing our stories and chose to put us together for HIS glory. If Brandon did everything the way I would do it, I would think he was perfect and wouldn't see my need for the Lord...and vice versa. Through our imperfections, we are reminded that we need the LORD and only HE can satisfy our every desire. Thus we long for Him more today than ever. 


Brings a tear to my eye to remember the song lyrics of our first dance at our wedding: "When God Made You He Must Have Been Thinking About Me." No doubt in my mind that God purposely made Brandon for me. It may rub me the wrong way sometimes when we are the first to leave a get together (and my whole life I was the last to leave!!) or he wants to watch a football game in the background at a wedding shower...these are just a few tangible examples of things that aren't always my favorite! On the other hand, I know there are tendencies I have that probably aren't his favorite! After flipping through Paul David Tripp's book and talking to my parents who just went to the "What Did You Expect" Marriage Conference with this author...Brandon and I are reminded that God is with us and will be the one to give us realistic expectations for our marriage. So neat to see how God wired marriage to bring us back to our need for HIM! 


Closing statement from the man of the house: “Simply put...I am crazy about my wife. No matter what she does...I am always going to be crazy about her. I daily thank the Lord that we walk in a state of forgiveness towards one another and are open about our differences... as they do point us to the place we want to be...seeing our need for the Lord more than anything else."