Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Speak LIFE About Your Mate

This has been a topic on our hearts for a few weeks now - but today is the time for us to share this. From the very beginning of our relationship, we have had mentors and people we look up to share with us the importance of speaking life about each other. This may seem like a simple fact - but it sure goes a long way! As we all know, experience is the best teacher. Through different experiences of being around people (whether married, engaged, or dating) who are NOT speaking life about their significant other - we have seen all the more how important this simple but HUGE point really is for a healthy marriage. 

The English Standard Version of Ephesians 4:29 says, "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear." And The Message version of this verse puts it like this, "Watch the way you talk. Let nothing foul or dirty come out of your mouth. Say only what helps, each word a gift." I love that word picture...look at each of your words as a GIFT. I know how much I love receiving gifts and giving them. In a day and time where we're looking to save money, put your gift giving dollars away for a minute and use your words as a gift...that's something that's free, but really priceless!!

The reality of all this is that there will be times where you need to resolve conflict with your mate (or significant other) but the thing that Brandon and I continue to see is that the time is not in front of a group. If there is something I need to talk through with Brandon (or vice versa), then we can handle that in private. Also, the time for me to "speak life" to and about Brandon is not always when he is right there in the midst of the crowd with me, but most important -- behind his back!! As we have mentioned time and time again, we are a TEAM...Team Nall to be exact! We are FOR each other. Therefore, we need to choose words that reflect that. Let's all practice this more often and see how it really does change our relationships for the better!

Closing statement from the man of the house: "It's true that the Lord keeps bringing this truth to mind a lot lately. We have seen firsthand how our marriage has been blessed by this - and how much hurt is caused when people don't choose life giving words about their mate...especially when that person is not around to hear all of the negative things. Not only does it hurt that couple, but it leaves a bad taste behind for all who heard the negative remarks."

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